Fun Easy English

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Smart Kids 2

TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" JOHNNY : "Because George still had the ax in his hand." ______________ TEACHER : Now, ! Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SAM : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WILLIE : Me! ______________ TEACHER : Tommy, why do you always get so dirty? TOMMY : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. ______________ TEACHER : Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I." ELLEN : I is... TEACHER : No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am." ELLEN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." _____________ TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" JOHNNY : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time." _____________ TEACHER : Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as brother's. Did you copy his? DESMOND : No, teacher, it's the same dog! ______________ TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? PUPIL : A teacher.

Smart Kids 1

TEACHER : Why are you late? WEBSTER : Because of the sign. TEACHER : What sign WEBSTER : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." _____________ TEACHER : Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? CINDY : You told me to do it without using tables!

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water? SARAH : H I J K L M N O!! TEACHER : What are you talking about? SARAH : Yesterday you said it's H to O! ______________ TEACHER : George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS : George! _____________ TEACHER : Jo, how do you spell "crocodile?" JOHN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" TEACHER : No, that's wrong JOHN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

Funny wife

Funny wife

A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me - my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor."

Pamela Stamp

Pamela Stamp

"Why did they stop printing PAMELA ANDERSON stamps in the U.S.?"
Answer: "Because people started licking the wrong side."

First Wedding Night

The new married couple are having their first night in the bedroom. Suddenly, the man asks his wife.

Man to wife on wedding night: "You sure I'm the first man you are sleeping with ?"
Wife replied: " Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others !"

A True Love of Millionare

Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire? " Millionaire: " I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "She must be some woman. What were you before you married her ? "
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"